Blew a fuse

Last Monday, Leo and I went to lunch and had a wonderful vegetarian meal at a Thai restaurant close by the data center where he was working. He's been really supportive about this whole vegetarian thing that I have to repeatedly tell him that he doesn't have to eat vegetarian just for me. He's always like, "It's okay, I want to do this." When really he probably hates it. And I hate it when he says things like that. Makes me want to slap him in the face with a t-bone steak. I sometimes think he does it just to impress me. Like he wants me to return the favor with a humongous blow job.

Anyhow, after our meal, we make our way to the data center. He gives me the grand tour and then enlightens me about the stuff he does when he's not playing online games. The stuff that normal people like myself call a job. I'm just bitter because I don't work from home like he does. On our drive back to my office, I was thankful that he didn't quiz me about what I learned from my experience at a Google/YouTube data center after his whole spiel. Cus dude, if he did, my only response would be FLUX CAPACITOR!

Feelin' down

I've been down lately. I can't really pin point what it is exactly, but I feel it. Part of it has to do with the workload at work. If I'm not working, I'm dreaming about working. In my dream, I wake up from a dream where I was working. On my weekends, like today, I was making a list of things I needed to do on Tuesday when I get into the office.

This afternoon, my boss had to force me to leave early because it's Memorial Day weekend. In his own words, he asked me if I was high AGAIN. It was because yesterday I walked into his office and said out loud "I AM SO HIGH ON DRUGS RIGHT NOW, PLEASE FORGIVE ME." In which he replied, "That's not exactly what you want to say when you walk into your bosses office." I just wasn't myself yesterday or today or the other day. I told him my situation from the get-go, so I'm glad he understands the root of my weird behavior and has shown deep concern about Leo's condition.

We haven't really told the internet yet, but Leo had surgery last week on his spine. Personally, I think this is a private family issue which is why I haven't blogged about it at all. I will go into greater detail after he's 100% (which seems to be sooner than later). I just don't want this blog to end up as a journal of his progression, because I already know for a fact that full recovery is imminent. We're all doing just fine - so worry not, friends. It's only a matter of time now before he's back to normal.

In the meantime, happy thoughts. :)

"Do you know that I live for you?"

A question Leo asked me after he arrived home on Saturday from work travel.

:)

Dramatic Candid

San Francisco, CA

It's interesting going through a heap of photos on my computer and then finding random ones like this one. I don't even remember how or who took the photo.

L.O.V.E.

A real IM conversation between Leo and I when we first started dating

Bluerooroo is me. Leo is foobar.

it is foobar: hi
bluerooroo: hi
it is foobar: what are ya up to?
bluerooroo: i'm washing my hair...sorry i cant hang out tonight
it is foobar: =(
it is foobar: hang out after your done washing your hair
it is foobar: ill wiat
bluerooroo: i'm sorry i can't
bluerooroo: my grandma is sick
bluerooroo: i have to take care of her
it is foobar: ok, well ill come over and help you
bluerooroo: no, i can't...my grandma is shy...she doesn't like strangers
it is foobar: ok, well what about when she falls asleep
bluerooroo: i go to bed early anyways
bluerooroo: i have school in the morning
it is foobar: what about breakfast tomorrow morning... just wake up 30 minutes earlier
it is foobar: and i'll take you to get some IHOP before school.
bluerooroo: awww how sweet
bluerooroo: but i'm sorry, i really cant
it is foobar: why not? dont you miss me?
bluerooroo: i dont want my parents to know i'm dating
bluerooroo: of course i miss you
it is foobar: dont go to school tomorrow
it is foobar: run away with me
it is foobar: we'll go on a road trip.
bluerooroo: where?
it is foobar: anywhere! everywhere!
it is foobar: wherever the wind takes us.
bluerooroo: you're psycho
bluerooroo: a very sweet psycho
it is foobar: no, i'm crazy.. there's a difference!
it is foobar: crazy in love.
bluerooroo: are we going to run away to mexico?
it is foobar: how about europe.
it is foobar: we can find jobs there and live there the rest of our lives
bluerooroo: my dad is going to kill me
it is foobar: he won't. he'd understand, and besides, we'll keep in contact with our families through emails and the interweb
bluerooroo: he's gonna come after you with a shot gun
it is foobar: he wouldnt kill me... not if we were married and had kids and lived in europe
bluerooroo: he will find you...my dad works for the c.i.a.
it is foobar: dont you love me?
bluerooroo: of course i do....
bluerooroo: we have to keep it a secret for now
bluerooroo: or my parents will have me by the neck
it is foobar: when can i see you again?
it is foobar: when can my heart beat again?
bluerooroo: you're heart will go on jack
bluerooroo: i mean...
bluerooroo: leo
bluerooroo: ooops
it is foobar: ARE YOU SEEING SOMEONE ELSE?!?
it is foobar: that motherfucker jack
it is foobar: imma kill him
bluerooroo: um
bluerooroo: no
bluerooroo: jack is my friend
it is foobar: I dont believe you
it is foobar: I'm going to get to the bottom of this, right now.
bluerooroo: jack has a gf
bluerooroo: her name is jill
it is foobar signed off at 7:56:54 PM.

A moment to reflect

I know. I'm a procrastinator. This post is over due. Suck it.

So...what can I say about 2007? Well, 2 major milestones happened. Getting through one year of being married and moving to a new city. That pretty much sums up the excitement of that year. The End.

Haha. All right. 2007 was not a bad year or a good year for me. You know, I lied. It was such a sad year for me. One, I missed my friends and family. Two, I was unemployed for almost a quarter of the year. Three, I've cried myself to sleep a lot. But on the same token, I am happy to be alive and healthy. My family is good. Friends are great. So lots to be thankful for.

(This is the part where I get really serious and semi-sappy)

Last year was the biggest wake up call that I am indeed a full fledged adult. Such a trip. The whole moving thing and trying to get our house rented out. Finding a job in a new city. It was scary and liberating at the same time. Scary because it was all so new. Liberating because I can finally live my life without any distractions and really focus on my own family. Lots of good descisions were made that year. But we won't really know how it pans out till a year from August.

Last month marked our one year wedding anniversary. There were a few bumps in the road. No major bumps. But enough to say that this marriage is definitely NORMAL. Moving was the ultimate test of patience for the both of us. Leo and I would fight about the stupidest things. For example, while we were trying to rent our condo out, we got in a huge fight about the paint on the walls. We've tried several types of white paint and made several trips to Home Depot. Leo was frustrated because he refused to paint over the new paint after I told him that "it didn't fucking look right." So instead, we hired some migrant workers. We were so tired and overwhelmed with all the changes that we were both going to go through. I had recently quit my job and so our finances were strapped. It was so bad that we both fell to our knees and cried. Embraced each other and said we were sorry. I remember sitting on the ground of our empty house just reaking of paint and my shirt all soaked in tears. At the time, this was not something I wanted to share on my blog. Although I did blog a lot during July, I remained coy about my feelings. It was a rather difficult moment. Lots of yelling and crying involved. Lots of curse words being thrown back and forth. It wasn't the best of times. But by god, am I glad it's over.

So now we are in 2008. We celebrated new years at home. And for the first time we celebrated it quietly. We watched the ball drop from the comfort of our living room. Although the excitement wasn't there, I was secretly celebrating that 2008 was here to stay for awhile. And that this would be a time to start over, move forward, and leave all that shit behind.

Photos from the move (via crappy camera phone, pre iPhone days):


My dog, Cookie, and the paint cans we cried over.


One of the two migrant workers we hired.


I cancelled my flight and decided to drive Leo's car up to the Bay. So I packed it with the left over crap and some over night clothes. The rest of the stuff in our house was in a seperate trailer heading for the Bay the following week.


My car being trailered for the long journey. This will be the last time it will see San Diego ever.


There is NOTHING IN MIDDLE CALIFORNIA. It was quiet a depressing drive after LA. The coastal scenic routh (I heard) is beautiful. This was the fastest way.


House warming package from dad - so we don't forget who we are when we look at ourselves in the mirror.


Cookie looking out from the window of our new house. This was his first day home.

How to break an expensive toy in two hours

...and make a 6 year old cry.

This is how we spent our weekend.



Priceless.

Woot.

My reward from Leo for finding a job.

Yes, it's true.

My search for employment is over.

I finally got a job!

College Football

Mary Anne: Now that we are up here in the Bay, which college football team do you want to root for?

Leo: How bout Notre Dame?

Mary Anne: Uh, they're not in California.

Leo: Yes they are. Go online.

Shows how much he really pays attention to college football or the movie "Rudy."

The verdict? Our local Stanford University. Go Cardinals!

EUREKA! IT'S BEEN FOUND!

I'm so happy. The airline I flew has the ring in its lost & found. I'm heading over there first thing tomorrow to pick it up. I was so bummed all day today. Virgin America was extremely helpful in locating it. That is one hell of an airline. If you ever get a chance to fly with them - do it!

Lost wedding band

This morning, Leo attended his personal training at the gym. I followed along soon after. We had taken separate cars because of his doctor's appointment after the gym. While he was lifting weights with his trainer, I noticed that he wasn't wearing his wedding band. I figured he must of taken it off prior to his work-out so I knew he was aware that it wasn't on.

We both left the gym at the same time.

As we were walking towards our cars, I had asked if he had taken his ring off and forgot to put it back on. It was then he realized he never even took it off. We soon found out that he lost it during his 3 week work travel after a bit of investigation, in which he claims he never took it off. Our only explanation is that it slipped off during the plane ride due to the high altitudes. Seems far fetched, I know. But I really don't know what else to think of it.

I would be lying if I said I wasn't sad, because I am. It's only natural for a girl to mourn over the lost of a wedding band. And it's also natural for a girl to gorge herself into heaps of chocolate ice cream and 5 shots of tequila chasers because of it. And not because it was an expensive platinum band or the fact that it hasn't reached it's one year anniversary. It's the fact that I love the person who wore it and that no matter where he went or if he had any doubts, he will always be reminded of that.

How I know I married the right one

*Phone conversation with Leo in New York. Mind you - he's been gone for three weeks.*

Leo: Maybe when I come back home, we can switch sides of the bed. You can sleep on my side and I can sleep on your side. You know...to spice it up a bit.

Me: Oh yes. I'm getting so turned on thinking about your side of the bed.

[Mom, I really hit the jackpot with this one.]

Blogging: A lose/lose situation

On the previous post, Erin had left a comment on which really motivated me to type up this long post about "blogging." So motivating, I went to Jamba Juice in my pajamas to pick up a drink with a double shot of energy boost at 8:48am. The place opened at 9.

So let's get really real here.

I started blogging since the age of 15 - which is a fact that I'm really proud of. I never had an actual notebook type of diary because I was an attention whore. I always had friends I confided to about life because I found it easier to never deal with problems alone.

About the time I was 16, I was going through a shit load of changes. Hormones, boys, being a jock, high school dances, conservative/traditional Asian parents, rebelling. You get the picture. Finding out the various platforms to use so I can publicly speak my mind, I found Blogger. Before Blogger, I used FrontPage and other free crappy publishing programs that served it's purpose but failed to appeal. Apparently, some things never change, do they?

During the time I began blogging, I lost several of my "best friends" due to irreconcilable differences (our periods never failed to synchronize). Yes, plural. Really defeats the purpose in the "best" part - but you know how it is. This really struck a social hole in my teenage life. That's when I discovered that blogging always seemed to fill that "friend" void. I would rather not mention any names at this point in time. I have only the utmost respect for my friends. For confidentiality sake, lets refer to these people as "The Fucking Bitches Who Ruined My Life" or "T.F.B.W.R.M.L." (TFBWRML)

Sadly, I found the blogging experience better than any friend I ever had. To put it in a better perspective, it's like when a lesbian realizes she prefers vagina over penis afterall. Same revelation.

As a blogging veteran, I've learned to keep my mouth shut about certain subjects. In a few minutes, I'll elaborate on the details as to why things are better left unadvertised. For example, politics, Kailee, my health, the domestic front, family, etc.

A few years ago, my mom and older brother found my blog on the internet. Life has a funny way of timing things, don't you think? Well, it was during a time when I thought publicly putting people on blast was a better idea than saying it in their face. For me it was a better way to cope than it was to deal with confrontationally. I was a teenager who didn't want to deal, bottom-line. The end result of publicly bashing my family members was not a pretty one. I got punched in the stomach by my brother and a total ass beating from my mom. Had I known that child abuse was such a huge offense back then, I would of probably called 9-1-1. But what did I really know? I lived under an Asian household where beating your kids was as normal as white person eating turkey on Thanksgiving. I can't name one Filipino person who has never been hit by their mom's flip-flops or father's belt. Experiencing the wrath of a Filipino parent is like being held captive in a concentration camp. The torture - it never ends. What's even scarier than that was, how anger really brings out the speed and accuracy in my Mom's throw. WTF?! She can't even pronounce "spaghetti" without the "es" before "paghetti." Who would of known a slipper would be that lethal? HI MOM!

WHY DO YOU KEEP TALKING ABOUT YOURSELF ON YOUR BLOG?

Another incident happened a few years ago which I can recall so vividly, a TFBWRML called me on my phone regarding my blog, bawling in tears, saying, "WHY DO YOU KEEP TALKING ABOUT YOURSELF ON YOUR BLOG?" Before you start laughing, let me justify her reasoning as to why she would even ask such a bizarre question. BECAUSE IT WAS OBVIOUS I DIDN'T TALK ABOUT ANYONE ELSE. This was the same girl who threatened to burn my parents house down and also the one who tried to convert me and Leo into democrats with e-mails (in her defense, it was worth a shot), this was the same person who said I was a bad mother, same person who messaged me on MySpace to tell ME(can you believe that?) to grow up on MySpace (because telling people on your MySpace account to grow up is not hypocrite at all), same chick who said that my very own family dislikes me and my atittude.

Oh. Btw, I wanted to share a photo of my parents, my sis and I in San Francisco last weekend. Can you see the hate in my dad's embrace? Very mean and very nasty.

This was the same girl who threatened to call Child Protective Services on me. She claimed that she had all the evidence she needed to take me to court. Of course, no course of action was taken because when people aren't well, they like to make-believe. I spoke to my parents about TFBWRML and they seemed as perplexed about the whole situation as much as I was. But I reassured them that she was on medication and going through therapy, because afterall, she did advertise it on her blog. Isn't that where everyone finds their reliable sources these days. The internet? Leo and I learned to brush her off like stubborn piece of shit on our lawn. It's been years now that she finally stopped harrassing us. Maybe she just needed time to grow up or work out her personal issues or time to discover Midol. Who knows. Maybe we can finally call truce on this whole thing.

You see boys and girls, there's absolute logic behind this. And I've been through hell and back to finally realize what it takes to be a vigilant blogger.

"If you don't talk about your kids, you're judged as a bad parent. If you talk about your kids, you're parenting is judged."

I don't go into detail about what Kailee does day-to-day. I don't even mention that she likes to play outside with another girl. Call me paranoid, but they don't have shows on Dateline MSNBC about pedophiles for nothing. I don't mention what time she gets out of school, the color uniform she wears, our street address, what time she is in bed, the address of our condo we're trying to sell, and the nearby places we live. I post a moderate amount of photos and info about her for confidential reasons. I was a bit apprehensive the other day to even mention that Kailee and I were home alone and Leo was out of town for work. Believe me, it was a well thought out decision that I made. Kailee and I don't even share the same last name! So the next time anyone has a fucking problem about me not being a mommy blogger just because I'm a mom (Captain Fucking Obvious), please think before you judge. You don't even know what the fuck my intentions are. You don't even know the extra precautions I take for my families safety. The only thing I ask from you is to acknowledge that I love my family as much as you love yours.

The Mommy Blogger Camp - a growing epidemic of moms who have yet to find their parenting identity

I've been asked by several moms why, why, why don't I talk about being a parent. Well first of all, my occupation right now is being a mom. I worked outside the home not too long ago. Even then I didn't mention my job or my co-workers on my blog. Frankly, that is the last thing on my mind when I get home. And if you're smart and want to keep your job, it's probably the last thing you would ever want to mention on your blog. Some people won't understand that being a stay-at-home parent is a job. And that's totally fine with me.

People don't realize how young Leo and I really are - or understand that the age difference/generation matters when comparing us to other parents - say over 35. We are probably the coolest parents by far in this fucking suburban neighborhood. I can guarantee that. I can't even begin to compare the coolest gadgets and clothes she gets to wear that most kids can't have. Her bedroom is larger than ours! We don't blog about how proud we are, or gloat about the coolest most amazing thing she did today. We just shower her with love and affection, praise her for her efforts, buy her cool crap and even have her grandparents visit her on special days.

Recent changes on MTTP

If you noticed, my lovely friend Erin mentions "stalkers" quiet frequently on the comment box. Why? Because it's been issue in the past.

For example, a recent incident happened last month. A guy from San Diego did a Google search on me after he noticed I was no longer taking my lunch break where he worked. Not knowing I moved to the Bay Area, he found me online. Typically when people ring you up on the register, they need to verify your credit card with a corresponding ID. Somehow I think that's how he knew my name and how he was able to track me down. He e-mailed me, asked me if I remembered him, and that he allegedly stumbled upon my blog after recognizing my face on the profile. If you noticed, I took down my photo, my e-mail address, mybloglog.com profile on the right column AND even added Leo as a guest blogger.

Unlike her, I've blocked several IP addresses in the past year who inappropriately comment on the photos. Haven't you noticed that it's never the same person who comments unless they're my friends or online friends? There's an absolutely perfect reason for that. And never before had I ever or ever wanted to mention what really happens here on MTTP. Honestly, I want to make new friends who laugh at my jokes or give me actual feedback. It's harder for me to be discreet about these things when people judge me for what I do or don't write. Plain ignorance is what it's called. And I hope in some way or form this has enlightened any of you to think twice about blogger's like me.

COO-GLE!

Hey folks. My sis, Leo, and I are at the infamous GooglePlex (Leo's work). Just wanted to type this up so you can bask in the glory with me.

It's 11:42.

Goodnight!

New Roommate

I have a roommate on this blog. His name is Leo. After several months of no updates on his blog, he decided it was time for his blog to go kaput. Which works out well, since his friends and our family know this web address, we can keep them informed about our lives up here instead of individually e-mailing everyone who ask how we're doing.

I have so much to blog about and so many photos to post. I wish I can find the will to write but so much change has occured in the past few weeks. Besides, my favorite season has arrived. No, not fall. Football season! We actually have something to look forward to during the week! And I would really like to talk football on my blog as weeks roll out. Yay!

Go Chargers!

Wizard School Drop-Out

Leo picked up a copy of the latest Harry Potter book last weekend. The NEW and LAST book (Thank god). The movie producers are probably having a hell of a time trying to conceal Hermoines ever growing boobs and Harry's hangover from the night before. I have never read a single Harry Potter book, nor do I intend to in the future. (Gasp). So does that make me un-cool? It's really not my cup of tea. I mean seriously, if I somehow acquire a flying broomstick, why the hell would I ever want to go back to wizard school? Do those kids have any idea how useless frequent flyer mile points would be? I read a lot. Just not Harry Potter. Although, I am quiet fond of the movies.

Anyway, Leo is a total die hard Harry Potter fan that sometimes I think it's just the most hilarious thing ever. Like when I attempt to reveal what happens in the end, he's like "NO!!!" He plugs his ears and chants "LALALALALALALALALALALALAL...I can't hear you...LALALALALALALALALALA." I told him this evening, if he ever fucks with me, I'm going to yell out who dies in the end because I read the spoilers (via the internet). He ran off to his royal throne, the toilet, to be by himself.

Fine. If that's how he wants to spend his evening, so be it. I'm sure it's harder to snuggle with, Harry Potter, the hardcover lover.

Wrestlemania!

Last night, Leo and I watched some UFC. Coming from someone who has very little knowledge or experience in martial arts, I really enjoy watching it. Especially when I have someone like Leo, who's taught kung fu, to kind of guide me through the basic fundamentals of mixed martial arts.

If I ever told my girlfriends that I watch this type of crap on tv, they would roll their eyes so far behind their heads, that by the time it reaches full circle, I'm no longer in the room. As if to say the only time I should speak to my girlfriends, is when I have more important things to say like shoes and why he dumped her. Which explains why I don't have any girlfriends in the first place.

Growing up with boys, I was exposed to a lot of Wrestlemania. Very popular during my youth. I remember watching a 24 hour marathon of Wrestlemania with my bro and cousins, while jumping off couches and on to each other's backs with pillows and plastic chairs (not metal folding chairs). Then imitating the wrestlers and their silly hand gestures to their male genitalia. I always thought that was so hilarious. Because oh my god Mom, HE'S POINTING TO HIS BOY THINGY! SO GROSS.

Mayhem in the Mighty Household

It's been a hell of a week for both of us. Month, for that matter. A few weeks ago, I had mentioned that we were flirting with the idea about potentially taking jobs somewhere else. And by that, I mean moving out of San Diego. Well, this idea may soon become a reality. It's only a matter of time now. And not only are we eargerly waiting to know, but our whole family, relatives, friends, and even co-workers/boss' are eager to know too. And I can't stress enough about how tired we are from being harrassed by everyone about this whole moving thing, that I think it's even gone way out-of-hand.

For example, last week my boss (Vice Pres.) fires one of our co-workers and in verbatim says, "Mary Anne. Okay. We let [co-worker name here] go, we want you to take her place as an incentive for you to stay with us." Basically he fired my co-worker, the weakest link in our department, so I could get promoted, make more money, and shut the hell up. This was seriously 3 days after I told him about the potential move. POTENTIAL MOVE. THE MOVE THAT WAS POTENTIAL. So now the position is mine for the taking. UNLESS, of course if I leave. Which would be unfortunate because it was the job I was initially applying for when I was working in Downtown LA. I really like where I work.

At Leo's current job, his co-workers/boss are anticipating how much this company is willing to offer him. Possibly two things can happen: 1. Leo will receive a counter-offer from his current employer for him to stay 2. Leo will take the job with the other company and his co-workers will use Leo's offer as ammo for their boss' to give them raises or perhaps even leave for better opportunities.

It's a mess. And my brain is on the fritz.

At the end of the day, one thing matters the most. MONEY. Money, money, money. It's a real shame that we spend our entire lives based around the foundations of our livelihood. Unhappy. Unappreciated. Corporate American. And how shallow we are to measure success based on our paychecks instead of what we're worth as individuals. (I'm just bitter because I'm broke right now. LOL. I'm just talking out of my ass. I really need to get to bed. I have to wake up at 5am.)

To wrap things up, It's really up to the leader to make the final decision on this one. Because afterall, he will have the opportunity to be working with one of the greatest companies in the world.

Opportunity has definitely come knocking. HARD.

Good night, Friends.

A snippet of this mornings conversation in bed

Mary Anne: "Have you ever fucked a donut?"

Leo: "That would be so weird."

Which translates to me that he hasn't, but would.

Engagement Anniversary

Where to begin.

For those of you who have not followed along with my blog a year ago from today, which is virtually impossible anyway because my archives from 2006 have been deleted accidently by an idiot (me), Leo proposed and I, with my eyes ready to fall off their sockets from the unbearable flood of tears, said yes.

However, there were a couple of minor set-backs that unfolded. But Leo's improvisational quick thinking made it impossible for me to even tell.

On that fateful morning of April 23rd, 2006, above the cliffs of a quaint coastal village in Maui, my emotions got the best of me. The moment I turned around and saw Leo on bended knee, I immediately knew. And the sight of the ring strangely impaired my hearing. Too surprised to even say the word yes, I almost fell to my knees crying. My inner-emotional-whore came out in hiding. It was horrible. What's even more horrible, was that I don't even recall saying "yes." Although, I did recall the snot I smeared on Leo's left shoulder.



Despite the fact that my face had swelled up into a heap of what almost appeared to be Botox fluid, it was the perfect fairy tale engagement story. Being on a tropical island, on a bright sunny day, on a cliff overlooking the ocean, breeze blowing through our hair, embraced in each others arms. How picture-perfect can you really get?



And not to mention, the ring. OMG. I don't know where to even begin. Leo knew exactly what I wanted and more. Not that my expectations would be any less, but he just totally exceeded the criteria of the ring I had in mind. He's even gone as far as doing his homework on diamonds which really surprised me. Going store to store and asking sales people. Researching online and customizing the ring band and diamond down to the last carbon and milligram. Well not that far. But close. He's a total nerd with exquisite taste. Now that has KEEPER written all over it.

To read about how it really went down from the beginning to the end, here's Leo's version of the engagement story.

Enjoy.

Good Luck to My Little Engineer-That-Could

Just wanted to say good luck to Leo who is flying out to San Jose right now to take the final portion of his CCIE test/lab tomorrow. For the unenlightened, this test is supposedly the holy grail of his career as a senior network engineer. The creme de la creme of all test. A major milestone that will put a huge dent on his resume and will justify how geeky he really is.

It's really cute to watch him explain routing and switching to me. I'm almost convinced he gets turned on by this stuff. Almost like dirty pillow talk but having to use every single part of your brain to comprehend the solution to reaching "climax." It's that convoluted.

So good luck, Sweetheart. Don't sweat it. You'll do fine. Just remember... Momma needs a new pair of shoes!

xoxo

And so it begins

Leo and I have been together for almost 4 years now. Three years as boyfriend/girlfriend and five months as a married couple. In the years I've known Leo, he's always maintained good "guy habits." Habits that I didn't appreciate till last weekend. The weekend HE LEFT THE TOILET SEAT UP FOR THE VERY FIRST TIME.

His response was a meager, "Oh...wow...I guess I'm just letting myself go."

Was I surprised? No, not really. And it's because I've already accepted the inevitable -- that eventually we would succumb to letting ourselves get fat and that our weekend activity would only involve handing each other the remote control. That does not surprise me one bit.

What REALLY surprised me, however, was when he did not slap my ass to get him a cold drink and call me "Women" after the incident. Because that would have been a predictable way to end the conversation for a man who says he "let himself go."

Something eHarmony should include on their compatibility survey: How do you rate in "tact"?

(Leo & Mary Anne walking towards the grocery store from parking lot.)

Leo: (*Loud belch*) "Buuuuuuuuuh."

(Lady with a shopping cart looking repulsed.)

Lady: "Oh, excuse you. How awful! How disgusting!"

Mary Anne: (*Laughing*) "Oh my God. She totally heard you...that lady over there."

Leo: "Well she can suck my dick."

(Lady turns around in complete and utter disgust.)

---------

(Leo & Mary Anne inside the grocery store's vegetable aisle.)

Mary Anne: "Did you know that one teaspoon of semen has 5 calories?!"

Leo: (*Embarrasssed*) "Uh...no."

Mary Anne: "Leo, I'm on a diet. I refuse to (*censored*)!"

---------

(Leo & Mary Anne at Blockbuster Video. Leo picks up a copy of a DVD with two girls in scantily clad attire.)

Mary Anne: "What's that?"

Leo: "It's Van Wilder."

(Walking towards the register.)

Mary Anne: "Oh, of course. Because you like girls with huge tits."

(Leo looking embarrassed, again.)

---------

(Leo & Mary Anne get in the car. Leo breaks silence.)

Leo: "I don't like it when you do that, Babe."

Mary Anne: "Do what?"

Leo: "When you yell tits out loud!"

Mary Anne: "No, I didn't. I didn't yell it."

Leo: "Yes, you did. Your voice gets loud all of sudden when you said girls with huge tits. And when we were at the store, people were looking at us weird because you were yelling out that you didn't want to (*censored*). Have some tact! Geez."

Mary Anne: (Tact?) "Well you know what my answer is to that? THOSE PEOPLE CAN SUCK...MY...DICK."

Leo: "Oh-kay. Why?"

Mary Anne: "Because that's what you told the lady when she heard you burp out loud! It's not like, when I do something to embarrass myself, I tell people to suck my dick. And when it's you who does it, I just laugh it off. I don't get mad at you for not having tact."

Leo: "Why did she hear me say it?"

Mary Anne: "Uh, she looked right at you."

Leo: "Touche... I guess we were meant to be. Don't you think that's kinda sweet?"

(Silent treatment.)

A die-hard for Blogger

Last year, I mentioned that I was going to switch to Wordpress because apparently I wasn't too happy about my blogging experience with Blogger. Although, Blogger has progressively made publishing quicker and has essentially been painless to use, I am still not pleased. Perhaps it's just laziness or the fact that their customer support lacks support. It's a love and hate relationship.

Three reasons why I've gone as far as I have with Blogger:

1.) Google owns Blogger. You can only expect magical things to happen when a company that big takes over.

2.) I really am that lazy.

3.) Blogger and I go way back. I mean back to when the Blogger sign-in page had a counter of how many members sign-up for an account, which back then was less than a million. Unfortunately, this is my second account. My old account I no longer use. It would've been really cool to see my "Member Since" on my old profile.

Moving over to Wordpress would be like ending a long relationship. A relationship that outlasted any relationship I ever had with a boy.

As ridiculous as it may sound, Blogger holds a lot of sentimental value. You see, a few years ago my husband found me through my old blog. Thinking back at that, I wonder how life would ever be today if things were different. If I never wrote, would he still find me somehow.